Don’t Dwell On It! Really?

We must ponder!

When people offend you
Take you for granted
Don’t respect your love
She says – don’t dwell on it!

When they discriminate
Treat you like dirt
Walk all over you
She says – don’t dwell on it!

When they belittle you
Mock at your kindness
Hurt your self-esteem
She says – don’t dwell on it!

When Sun chooses windows
Leaving you in darkness
Depriving you of your right
Would you say – don’t dwell on it?

When Spring selects the privileged
And flowers don’t smile at all of us
If butterflies visit only the best
Would you say – don’t dwell on it?

If people had not dwelled
On atrocities heaped upon them
If they had not risen against
Discrimination and prejudices

If nobody had dwelled on
Equal rights for women
We would still be living in dark ages
Repeating the refrain – ‘don’t dwell on it!’

Either she is too wise
Or I am imprudent
Either way, I refuse to be dictated.
Sensitivities need to be respected.
© Balroop Singh, July, 2018.

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Balroop Singh


27 thoughts on “Don’t Dwell On It! Really?

  1. This was an interesting poem. On one hand, we should dwell too much on what others say as it is their opinion. But as you alluded to at the end of the poem, if society always ignored women’s voices and all of us didn’t dwell on it, we’d still be living in a less progressive world. You summed up your message in your last line there. Sensitivies, and everyone, needs respect, and time. Sometimes we do need to take a moment and think about things a bit more carefully and how they may impact others around us. Very well written.

    1. Thanks Mabel, when I wrote this I had the insensitive people in my mind. They hurt and try to convince you that its okay not to think about it. Is it possible? Yes, we shouldn’t dwell on the opinion of others if they try to judge you but discrimination and disrespect needs to be dwelled upon as it clarifies the kind of relationship one has with you.

  2. Happy to read these words. Respect is something that is taken for granted. I feel everyone needs respect. Everyone needs to be appreciated for their choices – good or bad after all these are all relative. Nothing is absolute!

    1. Choices and respect are two separate things arv. You may not choose to disrespect while it may be considered so by another person…it is a matter of perspective, which exactly inspired this poem.

    1. Thank you so much Lisa…who could understand this poem better than you my friend. It warms my heart to hear that you are going to read more of my poetry. I am sure you are going to enjoy it.

  3. Powerful reminders. We never stop building ourselves. We should do it on a regular basis, as women and human beings. It all starts from within… but it doesn’t depend exclusively on us.
    Much love, dear Balroop. Thanks for sharing 😘💗

    1. You are so right Aqui…all depends on us and how we build our perspective. People respect us only when we turn around and tell them what is disrespect. Thank you for sharing your thought. Stay blessed dear friend.

  4. I like how you touched on two perspectives of ‘dwelling’ Balroop. As others have already said, we shouldn’t dwell on words that hurt us or shut us down. Our skin needs to be thicker and stronger. Otherwise, we’d crumble in a heartbeat. But we should dwell on societal issues that affect our rights. Great poem with a powerful message!

    1. I have found dwelling quite helpful as it makes me understand people and their behavior. It is essential to navigate through hurts to emerge resilient. Negative thoughts help us see the positive aspects of a situation and we can choose what we think is right. It is good to be positive-minded but only after we have analysed life as it comes to us. Thank you Lauren for sharing your thoughts.

  5. I like to think of dwelling on things as analyzing, and I do love to analyze most everything. I’m rather good at it. I like connecting life’s various threads and understanding what led to what. However, I do tend to ruminate on certain issues at time too, and that is an unhealthy sort of dwelling. For those times, I actually put a rubberband on my wrist an snap it when my thoughts are getting the best of it. I literally snap myself out of it 😉

  6. I too like to analyse as it puts things and people’s behavior in perspective. It is self-satisfying too as we can understand how much of ‘me’ is to blame. All sorts of dwelling is healthy as it clears the mental cobwebs and negative thoughts need to be addressed before we bury them.

  7. Whoa, you really got me thinking here, Balroop. As a woman who enjoys yoga and meditation and avoiding stress (not possible, of course, but trying to stay calm), I’m more of a “don’t dwell on it” kind of person. But as your poem suggests, there are some subjects/events/injustices that we MUST dwell on and be energetically active against.

    1. I absolutely agree Pam and I don’t dwell on anything after I have analysed, pondered over and arrived at my own interpretations, which gives me inner peace. I often say…don’t have any regrets but embrace them as life-lessons and be positive BUT positivity stems from dwelling over all the thoughts and negative ones hit first. 🙂
      Thank you for sharing your thoughts, much appreciated.

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