Are You Beautiful?

Are You Beautiful?

Some people just look beautiful while some are really so. But it took me almost half my life to discern this truth.

A poetry lover, I had always believed “beauty lies in the eye of the beholder”…that the beholder has to be beautiful (to distinguish) never passed my mind or I couldn’t believe eyes are so different!

Who cares about inner beauty while growing up? A child doesn’t even know such a beauty exists and an adolescent would scoff at it!

Try telling a teenager to dress modestly and her dagger eyes would convey all! All cultural norms are thrown to the winds to acquire the so-called beauty.

Youthful attractiveness is a natural yearning and there should be no guilt about the desire to look beautiful.

The moment we become aware of physical charm and magnetism, we try our best to look good. The efforts never cease even if the awareness of ‘inner beauty’ dawns on us!

It is personal grooming, peer pressure to look beautiful and slim that molds our thoughts about beauty.

While youngsters feel that branded attire makes them look good, the latest beauty product makes their skin glow and the vogue of the day has to be followed, real beauty remains as elusive as getting nearer to your first crush!

It is the outer beauty that gets an immediate attention.Beauty quote

Inner beauty reveals itself slowly and only if you have the inclination to perceive it.

Eventually it is what kind of human being you are that matters but we come to know a person only after we remain in constant and consistent touch.

True beauty doesn’t radiate from the face, which has been daubed with cosmetics.

A gentle and a quiet spirit, the glow that you can feel within, the spark that brightens your smile, thoughts that guide you out of your own darkness…beauty is as simple as that!

One of our family friends’ beautiful daughter Sam visited me after a long time. She had this young, short and dark man by her side whom she introduced to us as her fiancé. I looked at him and my first thought was… ‘Is Sam going to marry this man!?’ Hardly a match for her!

During my conversation with this man I realized what a wonderful communicator he was, what a warm heart he possessed and with what ease he had endeared himself as a member of our family. ! I could catch the positive vibes that he emitted.

The same moment I felt guilty of judging him. Despite holding many workshops and discussions on topics of human interest and virtuous living, knowing very well that physical appearances are but a sham…how could I jump to such a conclusion!

We admire inner beauty yet get carried away by appearances.

“Outer beauty is like a decade; it doesn’t last forever. While inner beauty stays permanent like an ocean. By all means, hold strong to your inner beauty.” – Edmond Mbiaka

Societal pressures and touchstones define beauty for us till we learn we have been looking at superficial beauty, enhanced just to look appealing.

Even Google understands beauty in those terms, which have been set by people. Try to google the words ‘beauty images’ and see what you get!

Try looking up again with the words ‘images of beautiful men/women’ and the results would be almost the same.

I couldn’t find any suitable pictures of beauty that could resonate with this piece and therefore decided to create one with eyes!

Thank you for reading this. Please share your valuable reflections.

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Balroop Singh.

Money May Nourish Emotions But Can It Soothe Them?

Money

The magic of money is unparalleled, incredible and mesmerizing. It is that thrilling potion, which lures each one of us! It is the major motivating factor at any work place.

I know money nourishes emotions. The desire to earn more can never be overruled. The comfort it can buy is irrefutable.

It is only the need for money; the positive vibes it sends that makes people work. They pay attention to other aspects of work only when their needs are met and they are comfortable.

Most people think that employment means money, lots of money, which can fulfill their dreams of improving their life and style, which can give them freedom and choice, which can brighten and secure their future.

According to Euripides: “Money is the wise man’s religion.” If you have money you are respected, appreciated and envied.

Is it really thrilling?

Despite its alluring attraction, I have never had any close relationship with money. It was never my favorite friend because it eluded me when I needed it, when I was forming my first impressions about people and things.

So I developed ‘shun it’ attitude and we were both happy. A ten-rupee note, which my mother could afford to give me every month, always graced my little purse as I assumed that it was non-existent.

It taught me reticence:

Money always kept me away from my rich friends who offered free rides in their cars, who tried to lure us into bunking classes and have fun at the cafeteria of our college or watch the latest movies.

It also helped me understand its real value. It made me an introvert.

When I got my first salary, I couldn’t see money. It was transferred directly into my bank account. So its warm vibes couldn’t reach me. I also didn’t make any effort to pick up those vibes. It couldn’t soothe my emotions. Probably I had become immune to its non- existence!

Yes, I did spend it to buy some dresses of my choice and for the first time felt its aura and its magic. But it failed to revive my dead emotions; I could never befriend it!

Is it valuable than Relationships?

And then I married! Since I had hardly developed any warm relationship with money, I resigned my job immediately and was extremely happy to start a new life. People frowned at my decision but I didn’t care. I knew by instinct that relationships are far more valuable than money.

Money quoteAs luck would have it, my faith in people didn’t betray me. I basked in the glorious sunshine of my little children and Mr. Serene who kept his promises of providing us with all that we needed.

It failed to revive its charm:

When I had plenty of money to buy anything I wished, I started avoiding it. I never paid any bills, never counted how much of it warmed my handbag when I went to work…all that was managed by my kindhearted, loving husband, whom I call Mr. Serene due to his calm attitude towards money and my outlook towards it!

Whenever we went shopping, I selected the things of my choice and stepped aside for the bill to be paid. This pattern has never changed and I will remain eternally thankful to people around me who keep their wallets full for me, even now!

Does money motivate you?

One day, sitting in my Literature class, I happened to read Henry Fielding’s observation: “Make money your god, and it will plague you like the devil.” I smiled but our professor was not amused. He threw me out!

Money could never plague me, as it has never motivated me for work. I have been more inspired by the people who spend countless hours working in their zones of interest like teachers, social activists and scientists who are not paid nearly what they are worth.

When we choose a profession, the first criteria for the selection is our passion. Obviously we earn money but it is not the only motivation; it is not the only goal.

How it blinds us:

  • It makes us selfish, greedy and even arrogant, at times.
  • It coaxes us to work extra hours and sacrifice our leisure.
  • It creates rifts between friends, siblings and parents.
  • It leads some people to unlawful activities like thefts, murders and frauds.

Do you feel you have enough of this demon? I know it can be angelic if we understand it well! Only those who try to evaluate its qualities can perceive this paradox.

One of my dearest friends always argued with me – ‘If you are skeptical about money being the motivator, ask a person who is unemployed, ask your vegetable seller who slogs every single day to earn money, ask your domestic help who has travelled hundreds of miles away from his home town to earn money.’ It is very easy to dismiss money as secondary when you have a lot of it.

How much of money is enough?

People have never been able to answer this question and there is no definite answer. I may sound absurd but money does not motivate if your basic needs are fulfilled. Some questions may help you discern the truth: Can it buy happiness and health? Can it buy love and loving people? Can it buy IQ? Can it buy time?

I am eagerly waiting for your answers.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh.