Expectations and Attachments Define Life

 

expectations

Recently I came across this statement, “The best way to get what you want is not want it.” The cynicism embedded in the above statement kept me awake for many hours. I had to pen down my thoughts to calm them. How can you call self-denial the “best way”? How can you quell your desires?

Expectation is a natural human instinct – a child expects attention, love and care. If he doesn’t get the basic care, his expectations don’t end there. He seeks them elsewhere.

Those children who grow up in misery and penury don’t get immune to expectations. Their eyes are always at the sky, anticipating all that they yearn for!

Our expectations flow like a stream that keeps widening as it touches the plains. The seeds of expectation are nurtured at a very early stage of life by our parents, teachers and friends.

This so called positive assertion of “giving up what you want” may have some spiritual connotation attached to it but tell that to a child or an adolescent and you would get the real looks! They may call you cynical; scoff at your advice and consider you too old to even interact with. Buddhist philosophy appeals only to the elderly.

Wants and desires are innate. They make us human. They are those streamers that inspire us to hang out despite the windy weather. They push us toward our goals, ignite a fire of excellence and lure us toward accomplishing more. Some of them lie dormant, waiting for the right opportunity.

Life would become meaningless and hollow without desires. True, they keep on multiplying; they may even disappoint us but without them all fun flies out of our lives. Expectations and attachments define life for us.attachments

Why attachments are essential: Initial attachments introduce us to people, they underline love for us and acquaint us with the basic values of bonding, care and respect. As children grow out of those attachments, ready to face the world, they feel connected with friends; they learn the value of love and nurture relationships to live a meaningful life.

What would life be without any attachments? All human emotions germinate from attachments, which may bind us emotionally but they keep us grounded to ennoble us. Only when we feel attached do we learn compassion. Solitude seems good only after having experienced all that human beings can offer to each other. Detachment is a mere word that has failed miserably despite its valuable aspects. When we try to detach, we have to snub what our heart says. Who would like to do that?

Needs have a profound connection with attachments. Why do you need a smart phone? Our grandparents could do without it yet somebody thought of better connections. Needs, however absurd they may seem, lead us to progress, to a better society and fulfilling life.

Desires keep us motivated; they encourage us to strive, to keep going despite all the odds. They shape us into better human beings. They add fresh dimensions to mundane aspects of life.

Giving up expectations and attachments is like giving up your hold on life. I am sure all of you would agree. Please share your reflections.

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Balroop Singh.

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The Fairy Who Couldn’t Fly

Fairy
Image from

Born in the lush green woods
She was the darling of elf hoods
Who loved to play pranks
And hovered around the banks
Where she grew.

Her beauty could dethrone
The king of kings who hone
A desire to possess a gemstone
An unbridled undertone
That mentors our passion.

Teary-eyed she looked around
Tried to hear the strange sound
Why she had been bound
To those weird wires in a mound
Where she lay trapped.

Wan and weary she thought
Of fairy grandmother who had taught
Never show your weakness if caught
Lie still with a secret draught
Of desires that disconcert.

Years of subjugation and crippled wings
Smothered her joy with nasty stings
Slayed her passion for warm springs
Erased her yearning for all the things
She lost the longing to spread her wings.
© Balroop Singh

 

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Dreams…A Domain We Love To Visit

Dreams

Like fragrant flowers under our feet
Like diaphanous drops of first rain
Like moonlight soothing our eyes
Like water boats floated with childlike charm
Dreams remain our precious possessions.

Dreams gently caress us, carry us along
Awaken us out of their magic
Sometimes, stimulate us into activity
Encourage us to embark on the journey
To make a beginning, to plod on

Dreams are those concepts, those desires
Which remain deeply entrenched in us
Till we work on those images of mind
Flow in their current, shield them
From stormy waters… love them!

Dreams ignite a fire within us
A fire of reality, of confidence, of success
They push us into the life of adventure,
To rush, to explore, to accomplish
They steer us towards our goal

Dreams drown dreary thoughts
Keep us alive in the worst of times
They give wings to our heavy heart,
They transport us into another world
A world of our choice.
© Balroop Singh

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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