Detachment – A Disconcerting Word

Detachment poem

I have been dealing with this demon of detachment ever since my nest became empty, reflecting on how disconcerting this visitor is and why he chooses to lurk around despite the rebuffs he faces.

I tried to humor him with poetic immersions, offering the best of emotional entreaties to leave me alone and warning him that he was an unwelcome guest. He still smiles and cajoles me with his capers.

He tries to pull me out of emotional attachments, which cloud our judgment, which shackle us to our past, which are like a lump in the throat, declining to dissolve.

He acquainted me with my new self, his cold touch warmed up when he dragged me out of my cocoon to look around with a new perspective. He has redefined the hues of life for me and has been exhorting me to look beyond emotions.

He tells me that there is much more to life than just attachments.

He almost succeeded! His friendship brought tranquility in my life. I learned to lower my expectations.

Despite his sincere efforts, new attachments have gently tiptoed into my life, brushing aside this demon with their tiny feet. My love-hate relationship with him has grown as he keeps cautioning me… ‘Earthly attachments have to be abdicated one day.’

My love for my grandchildren has been overshadowed by this demon who refuses to leave albeit I show him the door everyday. His long shadows follow me everywhere. He gets extremely jealous of their prattle, their hugs and the games we play. He has to sit alone!

The other day this demon knocked me down when we were playing ‘let’s catch’. I know he was missing the fun we were having and wanted me to behave like a grandma.

While I was sitting on the ground, nursing me twisted foot; my four-year-old grand daughter hugged me and told me…’its ok, its a little hurt, you are fine’ and my little grandson sat on my lap to soothe me, just like I do!

Can you think of detachment when there is so much of love?

Can you shrug off new attachments as transient and delusive?

I know “attachment is the great fabricator of illusions….” BUT

We have found again
Those tiny hands, happily holding ours
Those dainty feet, walking willingly with us
Those exquisite eyes, eagerly waiting
Those moments of eternal bliss!

The delight that shimmers in their eyes
Returned our perennial pride, our glory
Restored the world of fragrant fairy tales
The glow of gratitude glimmers
Reassuring many more years of love.

Thank you for reading this. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

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Balroop Singh.

#writephoto The Power Of Invitation

passage

Each step evoked emphatic emotion
Indecisiveness stopped me as I wavered
Love impelled me towards the door
Gleaming glow attracted as hope soared

Memories came gliding down the railing
One after the other like siblings smiling
Laughter reverberated around me
All those celebrations I could see

The staircase was suddenly alive
With music and numerous sounds
Confetti came softly swaying down
Out of nowhere…embellishing my gown

I knew forgiveness lay behind the door
It was finally open…
The glistening gleams beckon
And I enter with dreams to reckon

Soft steps towards familiar faces
Moist eyes, passionate hugs
Years of separation melt within hours
Thanksgiving invitation empowers!
© Balroop Singh.

I owe gratitude to Sue Vincent for an inspiring photoprompt, which was too hard to resist!

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I Don’t Like Her Yet She Taught Me Gratitude

gratitude

She came too early, poking me with her icy finger but I snuggled deeper into my bed, ignoring her presence. She kept creeping slowly into my bones till I was wide-awake. In no mood to pay any attention to her, I closed my eyes tightly, covered my ears sideways and pretended sleep.

I lay awake for almost an hour, opened my eyes and saw her lurking near my feet. It was still dark outside. I couldn’t fall asleep. Random thoughts and memories reminded me I must get hold of my book to shut them off. At last I had to surrender, grab my Kindle to calm my leaping mind.

I had hardly read a page when she froze my fingers, demonstrating her power and grip. Now was the time to seal her out! I could no longer be kind. I was amazed at the energetic reaction of my body, gathering immediate momentum. I got up with a jerk, throwing my comforter aside and closed the window.

When she refused to back off I walked out of the room to switch on the heat and felt triumphant for an instant. I jumped back into my side of the bed but by now my husband was awake, wondering what was going on.

He chuckled off my explanation and went back to his snoring mate.

I couldn’t concentrate on the book I was reading, an old classic. Provoked by the curiosity to know how people kept themselves warm in ancient times, I got up to retrieve my laptop from my study. She sat there, pounced on me instantly and wreaked her vengeance. I have been sneezing since then, with watery eyes and rivulets of water dripping from my nose.

She spoke to me in a very credible manner! My oldest foe, she reminded me how she had always wielded her power over me, how her advent had to be respected with caution or she could tip-toe into my life the moment I woke up to put my foot on the floor and how her sneezing gift was always ready for me.cold-quote

She vanished into thin air as I settled cozily on my couch, with my tea.

If an Early Man could jump out of the time machine, he would be bewildered at the comforts we have today…the central heating, the T.V. blaring out our favorite shows, ready-made foods on our shelves and endless other devices that connect us with the world in the fraction of a second!

Gratitude overwhelmed me at this moment and in my heart I thanked all those

  • Who had harnessed electricity
  • Who thought chimneys were messy and smoky
  • Who thought there could be better ways to keep us warm
  • Who worked industriously to create comforts around us
  • Who could design such well-equipped homes, in which the flip of a button could create warmth

We take many things for granted and comforts are one of them.

Modern children in metropolis can’t imagine a life without central air-conditioning. My nephew’s son visits his grandpa’s home in India every year. Once he happened to visit during the scorching heat of May and had an interesting question each time he had to go to the bathroom… “Why is the rest room so heated when the bedroom is so cool?”

He was too little to understand the meaning of gratitude and therefore his innocent queries were laughed off.

I think Thanksgiving is a good tradition to remind us that Mother Earth gives us most of all…light, love, water – the elixir of life, beauty and colors. Family get-togethers on this day emphasize the importance of love, relationships and harmony in our lives. Gratitude is a very small word to use for all the blessings around us, which make our life worth living.

Many such small incidents, which we dismiss as insignificant remind us of how thankful we should be. What are you grateful for?

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Balroop Singh.


 

Lessons Of Life

Lessons Of Life

Visual effects were almost complete
Eyes half closed, one hand invisible
A dried tear, a veiled vanity
A relationship gone awry
The picture was ready…
 
The painter – a half winged bird
Struggling to fly yet feigning finesse
Besieged by promises
Eternal wait…. edgy encounters
Enigmatic appearance after ages!
 
Misty mornings of camouflaged hopes
Eerie silence, long walks
Through the woods
What is this place? So familiar!
Nostalgia is painfully pleasant
 
Emotional fetters couldn’t affect
Art and inspiration
Forgotten façade couldn’t fade
Memories of hypocritical love
And gratitude for lessons of life.
© Balroop Singh
All rights reserved.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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How Good Teachers Can Get Inspired To Mold Personalities

Personality development

I didn’t realize the effects of a teacher on personalities till I stepped into this profession. Probably I didn’t have any such teacher around me whom I admired ardently or who could touch my heart but I do remember a few who emitted an unseen light, which could brighten the path of an average student.

When I stumbled upon the profession of a teacher, which I didn’t plan to follow, I was very keen to teach high school students. I thought it was easier!

I was told I needed a professional training.

Despite a teacher’s training degree in my hand, I hardly knew what makes a good teacher. I learnt it from my students, from my daily interaction with them and listening to their opinion and complaints.

Slowly it dawned upon me how much a teacher can give. I was amazed at the expectations of my students and I had to work very hard to come up to their beliefs.

I noted that a teacher is trusted more than a parent probably because a teacher really listens, is non-judgmental and supports the pupils who choose to confide in him/her.

Now I started grasping the real meaning of “Nation Builders.”

Now I knew that Good teachers are not born.

“I am indebted to my father for living, but to my teacher for living well.” – Alexander the Great.

I was humbled by this profession, which I didn’t want to join because people looked down upon it, it was so lowly paid and only those “who couldn’t find a better job became a teacher,” was the perception!

I found it immensely satisfying. The dividends it paid could not be counted, could not be seen because they could only be felt.

They stand before me now in the form of most successful human beings who value the contribution of teachers. Their one word of gratitude is the biggest bank balance for me.

My pupils showed me what is patience and benevolence; they revealed the value of hard work; they taught me how emotions are knitted into the fabric of values to make them more effective.

Once I had been molded by my students, it was my turn and this is what I learnt:

Children are like clay in our hands. Like a sculptor we can chisel and carve their personalities with our behavior.

“A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops.” ― Henry Adams.

Teachers appreciation

Teachers inspire the desire for learning:

True learning is the one, which is self-accentuated. A good teacher understands this basic principle and lays bare all the possibilities before the students. Curriculum may be binding, it may limit the potential but a real teacher focuses on igniting the minds to go beyond those limitations. Carl Jung has rightly observed, “The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.“

Make them discerning individuals:

Students look up to their teachers for guidance and path-breaking initiatives. When they meet an inspired teacher, they start believing in their own dreams. It is only with the much-needed encouragement that their aspirations get a boost. Classroom discussions play an important role in giving confidence to new thoughts and developing their own perceptions.

Make them absorb the values of discipline:

A disciplined teacher can convey the need and significance of discipline to become self-disciplined. Children may take pleasure in breaking the rules, they may scoff at the reprimand and punitive actions but what they see in their teacher eventually gets absorbed. An upright teacher doesn’t have to organize discussions on this topic.

Inspire positive thoughts:

Little disappointments seem gigantic to children, especially teenagers. Teachers can convert those moments of disenchantment into stepping-stones by talking them out of negativity. A good teacher can also become a counselor, as she/he understands students better than parents. Teenagers feel more comfortable in sharing their problems with their teachers or friends.

Values are learned effortlessly:

Good and conscientious teachers can touch the students with their kindness and patience. Little children learn more through observation and image. When their role model exemplifies the ethics enshrined in the rulebook, it is easier for them to imbibe them naturally. I have often heard my outspoken students complain about double standards, which confused them.

“Everyone who remembers his own education remembers teachers, not methods and techniques. The teacher is the heart of the educational system.” – Sidney Hook

They make an eternal impact on students:

I was surprised at the influence of my own child’s teacher on her when she refused to share the little secret of her school function with me saying, “it is a surprise for the parents and will be revealed only on the day the function will be presented!”

My own heart swells with delight when I meet my old students and can see a spark of brightness in their eyes while they talk about those ‘golden’ days.

Whether it is sharpening their speaking talent, acquainting them with their potential, or honing their social skills, a teacher can truly mold the personalities of students.

Did you meet any such teacher who made a difference in your life? I would love to hear about her/him.

Thank you for reading this. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

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Balroop Singh.