The Most Memorable Words Anyone Said To Me…

This post is inspired from Pragalbha’s question at Infinite Living
“What are the most memorable compliments given to you?” (Thank you Pragalbha and Debby at ThoughtSmith for the inspiration.) 

Memorable words? We often forget the good ones, as they are rare. But we yearn for them. I learned the power of words very early in life. I knew they could bore unseen holes in our heart, knifing deeper hurts that keep festering.

I learned to live with them; also hurl some back at those who deserved them. Then I met some loving persons, with divine streaks. I discovered the path to positivity. My confidence doubled. I stopped paying attention to judgmental people, I steered away from toxic persons around me and decided to change my perception.

Then I learned forgiveness. It was not easy; I had to pass through the cauldron of each negative thought, each unseemly word that refused to quit the crevices of my mind. Forgiveness fairy would visit me every night to caress my hair. She taught me how a kind word sends vibes of love, if we are perceptive, if we know how love permeates and proliferates with this little gesture.

She told me: We give a little kindness when we pay attention. We give a little hope when we listen patiently.We give respect by communicating honestly. We give a gentle message with our tender touch.

I understood the power of touch when one of my colleagues said:
“When you hold hands while talking, it seems you are really listening to me. I like it so much.”
Those words stayed with me.

“You have time for everyone,” another one said. The words warmed my heart.
Who doesn’t know the paucity of time specially when you are young, you know somebody is waiting at home and rushing becomes your second nature; when you are juggling with so many roles: A home-maker, a wife, a mother, a teacher, a mentor, a colleague and a friend.

Patient listening and responding with whatever kind words I could manage became my habit.

But the best compliment that I received indirectly from a friend is: “You have to peep into her heart to know her.”
She was asked how could she be friendly with me!

Frowned at by most of my colleagues for keeping distance from them, I was considered to be “an arrogant” but only few who tried to come closer, understood the walls that I had erected around me to keep the arrows of words away.

An excerpt from one of my earlier poems:

 Words silence; they take you into deeper dumps
Words soften; they can change your outlook.
Words hurt; they can cause irreparable damage
Words guide; they give us the power to introspect.
© Balroop Singh

If you like poetry, check my latest book: Magical Whispers

How Emotional Vibes Of Colors Affect Our Personality

Color quotes

Colors have always fascinated me as they are directly linked to emotions. Bright and happy colors spread vibes of ecstasy all around. They accentuate our celebrations and merge into our moods.

Colors respond to emotions and moods intuitively. They lend a new perspective to our lives.

It has been our tradition to wear bright colors for happy occasions to add that extra merry tinge to them. Muted colors are chosen for somber occasions.

My fascination for colors started very early, as I liked to paint more because I could play with various colors, mix them and create my own wonderful shades.

Growing up with the colors of my little garden made me understand and respect their significance. Watching flowers and butterflies was my favorite past time. Much of my love for nature is connected with the colors.

When Leigh Hunt said, ‘Colors are the smiles of nature’, he must have felt the emotional vibes of colors.

I learned to smile from colourful flowers, the rainbow and the sunset.

Colors of nature are more alluring as their hues change in the most natural manner.

Have you noticed the colors of the sky and the clouds…the dawn, the dusk and the dark clouds?

Gray may be a drab color but it keeps us riveted till thunder and lightening shake us out of our reflections. Its association with rain makes it all the more meaningful.

Gray also defines our romantic temperament!

Green, the most soothing and harmonious color binds us with Mother Nature. It emits positive vibes of growth, giving, prosperity and all embracing emotion. The exquisite attachments it creates are eternal!

I wonder how it fell into the hands of jealousy. Shakespeare’s ‘green-eyed monster’ doesn’t relate to the upbeat vibes of green color.

color quoteBlue color carries the vastness of the sky and the depth of the oceans, it breathes serenity and contentment and its shades merge all the emotions of fear, hope and trust.

Blue evokes divine blessings and infuses us with unflinching confidence when we say… ‘Sky is the limit’!

“Red is such an interesting color to correlate with emotion because it’s on both ends of the spectrum. On one end you have happiness, falling in love, infatuation with some one, passion, all that. On the other end, you’ve got obsession, jealousy, danger, fear, anger and frustration.” – Taylor Swift

Red has been my favorite color… how it got associated with danger, fear and anger is difficult to understand as red roses symbolize love and passion.

It is the most vibrant color that helps us thrive, the color of our blood, symbolic of life and energy.

A bride in Asian countries wears Red, which is the color of celebrating new sensitivities and relationships.

Red carpet welcome denotes honor, respect and grand reception but at the same time a red card or a red flag changes the whole vibrational frequency of this color!

The meaning and significance of many colors change according to places, cultures and circumstances.

The paradoxical uses of white are amazingly enigmatic.

White may be a color of purity, faith and innocence but it is worn at the weddings as well as funerals!

Black is as perplexing as white as it represents different meanings for people, occasions and cultures. A symbol of grief, it is also preferred for formal parties with great penchant.

When the night is black, the silvery white moon illuminates it with its unique color…its emotional appeal reaches many hearts and inspires the poets!

Yellow and orange, the beautiful colors of fall, of Sun and sunshine… a symbol of love, happiness, hope and heat. They blend into the blue to create a heavenly mesmerizing scene at the beginning and end of each day.

Ironically, they are also associated with fire, denoting danger but it was fire that introduced man to new avenues of progress.

Do you know we have only three primary colors? Red, yellow and blue.

All other colors are created from the combination of these colors. They are mixed and muted to create various shades for summer, winter and spring.

Do you know colors can change our emotional responses and our appearance? They can make us look happy or sad, heavier or lighter, romantic or boring!

If you want to see a riot of colors, visit India. Some of the states like Rajasthan, 532740_10150932713366007_1354189198_nPunjab and Gujarat are a living example of the brightest outfits, worn without any second thought.

Tulip gardens too present an outstanding specimen of how much colors attract us and affect our emotions.

What are your favorite colors? I have always loved the shades of pink and red and magenta. They keep me buoyant all the time!

If you have liked this article, please share it at your favorite social networks.

Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh.

How To Detach From Toxic People Who Are Unavoidable

5269_Carl-Hood-Peoples-Uniform_0018-backtoxic-friends

Toxic people are all around us. They meet us in the form of friends, family members, colleagues and neighbors. They may not consider themselves to be toxic; they can meet you most warmly and even can be good friends.

They focus on themselves; they are obsessed with their own pains and pleasures and are always on a look out for a person who falls an easy prey to their ambitions.

Some of them are highly toxic; they spit their venom all the time while others are endurable. But difference in their degree doesn’t make them any pleasant.

While I write this, two persons come to my mind.

One was so good and fun loving that I was surprised to see her negativity when I met her after a gap of ten years. She was a very dear friend who was also my classmate. I knew her well; we had spent six years of our life together. What had changed her so much?

When I tried to analyze, I could understand that it was the toxic atmosphere of her home and the attitude of the person whom she had married, which had metamorphosed her into a toxic person.

I tried to help her see the positive aspects of her disappointments but couldn’t do much as she had fallen into the deadly abysses of pessimism.

The second one met me as a colleague, who claimed to be my friend but was the fiercest rival. She would shift all the blame, criticize every sane looking person, take even a casual remark personally, think that nobody could do any job better than her and manipulate each and every person and situation.

Have you met such people? Can you recognize their traits?

“Watch out for the joy-stealers: gossip, criticism, complaining, faultfinding and a negative, judgmental attitude.” – Joyce MeyerToxic People

If they happen to be in our families, it becomes very difficult to maintain distance from them.

They may not just wallow in self-pity and talk negative; they want our attention; they expect sympathy and try to influence us.

“We would do ourselves a tremendous favor by letting go of the people who poison our spirit.” –Dr. Steve Maraboli

How to detach?

Ignore them:

Wherever you happen to see them, the best option is to avoid them. If they don’t get your signal, don’t respond to their overtures of establishing any contact with you. If they become overbearing, there is no harm to tell them candidly that you don’t want to hear any gossip or negative talk. They might feel hurt but there is no need to feel guilty because this is the only way to close your door and convey that they need to mend their ways.

Never argue with them:

As Mark Twain said, “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level”, similarly If you try to point out to toxic people that they are being unreasonable, you would be wasting your breath. Toxic people move in a straight line, their own line of make-believe. They never deviate from that path as it is always against their self-esteem. They don’t believe in respecting the opinion of others. If you try to challenge their beliefs, they can harm you inconceivably.

Keep your distance:

It is better to maintain some distance if they happen to be your colleagues, more so if he/she is your boss. Be cautious because they would try to provoke you, take advantage of you or assign you their own work too. They may even try to belittle you if you don’t respond to their unreasonable demands. Don’t get intimidated by their behavior. Face it and send the message that you are not going to take it.

Don’t feel guilty:

I have eliminated all the toxic people out of my life. It took many years to reconcile to the fact that they were toxic, it caused immeasurable pain to let go, the guilt lingered on for many days but it brought greater freedom and peace. It also brought the realization that when we cling on to certain people who are not adding any value to our life, who keep on pushing us down and shifting the blame of all their failures on us, who keep feeding on our goodness, we lose a part of our personality. We start doubting our selves.

Wish them well:

When you detach, stop thinking about them, have positive wishes for them in your mind, which would surely reach them. If they are the family members, they might consume a large chunk of your time and energy. Don’t let them gnaw at your emotions. Just accept the fact that they are not worthy of your love and concern.

Do you know such people? How do you deal with them?

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Thank you for your support. Please share your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh.

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