Dealing With My Dearest Buddy And Reprimanding Bully

creativity

The hangover of travel still lurks around me though I am back on my favorite couch, trying to wake up my creative critter, which seems to have gone into hibernation. Having failed to fuel my imagination for almost a month, I know I can’t pass on the responsibility to my dearest muse who responds spontaneously to stimulus.

When I struggle with self-doubt, Maya Angelou’s words reverberate around me
“You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have.”
Lately I have been spending too much time with the antagonists of creativity, seeking pleasure in the festivities, lounging around with family and friends and gathering some golden moments of delight.

‘Do you want to stay in your self-obsessed boundaries?’ I ask my creative buddy.
She just looks at me irately and closes her eyes.

‘You are my only love, my solace, my dearest confidant.’
She eyed me with a sneering satisfaction and dug deeper into its acrimonious abode.

‘Please come and sit with me, I have some interesting escapades to share.’
‘You have been selfish and unkind. You got mired in self-doubt. You are a procrastinator.’

I was taken aback but I knew she was right. I nodded a little, refusing to agree whole-heartedly with the indictments, trying to keep my vacillating valor intact within me.

‘Your complacency irritates me, your attitude is so annoying and your priorities are paradoxical. I have failed to understand you.’

‘But I love you. You are my only island of amity and tranquility.’
‘Love is not enough. You have to be consistent. You must know that love means ‘loyalty’, ‘obeisance’, ‘venerating’ and ‘eloquence.’

‘If you are not loyal to your words, they become elusive. If you lack obeisance, reflections fritter away. If you don’t revere your ephemeral ideas, they lack coherence and if you are not eloquent enough, your touch with your subtle self becomes feeble.’creativity-quote

The daunting discourse didn’t die down till I agreed to hold the hands of my reprimanding bully, nodding to all her diktats and flying away with her to cross the boundaries of horizon.

She reminded me…‘You have to be intrepid to jump off the cliffs, quit rational thinking and develop wings whenever wanted. You have to keep the fire burning and redefine your priorities.’

I didn’t like her preconditions because family has always been my priority. I have never looked beyond my practical responsibilities but I agreed, as I wanted to win her confidence. I know she is just cross. I know she too knows me well. She appreciates space but when it starts creating wedges, she possesses the potential to bridge the breach.

I sincerely hope I would come up to the expectations of my dearest buddy.

Have you ever been admonished by your creative self?
Thank you for reading this amalgamation of emotions. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

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Balroop Singh.

#writephoto The Power Of Invitation

passage

Each step evoked emphatic emotion
Indecisiveness stopped me as I wavered
Love impelled me towards the door
Gleaming glow attracted as hope soared

Memories came gliding down the railing
One after the other like siblings smiling
Laughter reverberated around me
All those celebrations I could see

The staircase was suddenly alive
With music and numerous sounds
Confetti came softly swaying down
Out of nowhere…embellishing my gown

I knew forgiveness lay behind the door
It was finally open…
The glistening gleams beckon
And I enter with dreams to reckon

Soft steps towards familiar faces
Moist eyes, passionate hugs
Years of separation melt within hours
Thanksgiving invitation empowers!
© Balroop Singh.

I owe gratitude to Sue Vincent for an inspiring photoprompt, which was too hard to resist!

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I Don’t Like Her Yet She Taught Me Gratitude

gratitude

She came too early, poking me with her icy finger but I snuggled deeper into my bed, ignoring her presence. She kept creeping slowly into my bones till I was wide-awake. In no mood to pay any attention to her, I closed my eyes tightly, covered my ears sideways and pretended sleep.

I lay awake for almost an hour, opened my eyes and saw her lurking near my feet. It was still dark outside. I couldn’t fall asleep. Random thoughts and memories reminded me I must get hold of my book to shut them off. At last I had to surrender, grab my Kindle to calm my leaping mind.

I had hardly read a page when she froze my fingers, demonstrating her power and grip. Now was the time to seal her out! I could no longer be kind. I was amazed at the energetic reaction of my body, gathering immediate momentum. I got up with a jerk, throwing my comforter aside and closed the window.

When she refused to back off I walked out of the room to switch on the heat and felt triumphant for an instant. I jumped back into my side of the bed but by now my husband was awake, wondering what was going on.

He chuckled off my explanation and went back to his snoring mate.

I couldn’t concentrate on the book I was reading, an old classic. Provoked by the curiosity to know how people kept themselves warm in ancient times, I got up to retrieve my laptop from my study. She sat there, pounced on me instantly and wreaked her vengeance. I have been sneezing since then, with watery eyes and rivulets of water dripping from my nose.

She spoke to me in a very credible manner! My oldest foe, she reminded me how she had always wielded her power over me, how her advent had to be respected with caution or she could tip-toe into my life the moment I woke up to put my foot on the floor and how her sneezing gift was always ready for me.cold-quote

She vanished into thin air as I settled cozily on my couch, with my tea.

If an Early Man could jump out of the time machine, he would be bewildered at the comforts we have today…the central heating, the T.V. blaring out our favorite shows, ready-made foods on our shelves and endless other devices that connect us with the world in the fraction of a second!

Gratitude overwhelmed me at this moment and in my heart I thanked all those

  • Who had harnessed electricity
  • Who thought chimneys were messy and smoky
  • Who thought there could be better ways to keep us warm
  • Who worked industriously to create comforts around us
  • Who could design such well-equipped homes, in which the flip of a button could create warmth

We take many things for granted and comforts are one of them.

Modern children in metropolis can’t imagine a life without central air-conditioning. My nephew’s son visits his grandpa’s home in India every year. Once he happened to visit during the scorching heat of May and had an interesting question each time he had to go to the bathroom… “Why is the rest room so heated when the bedroom is so cool?”

He was too little to understand the meaning of gratitude and therefore his innocent queries were laughed off.

I think Thanksgiving is a good tradition to remind us that Mother Earth gives us most of all…light, love, water – the elixir of life, beauty and colors. Family get-togethers on this day emphasize the importance of love, relationships and harmony in our lives. Gratitude is a very small word to use for all the blessings around us, which make our life worth living.

Many such small incidents, which we dismiss as insignificant remind us of how thankful we should be. What are you grateful for?

Thank you for reading this. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

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Balroop Singh.


 

This Fall Is More Blissful

fall

The fall adds wings to my words
The soft swish of breeze carries them away
Floating down merrily, they smile at me
And dance around with glee.

The ‘J’ of joy, the ‘M’ of melancholy
The ‘S’ of solitude, the ‘T’ of twilight
The ‘H’ of hope, the ‘C’ of calmness
All merge into each other

Enhancing the beauty of brilliant decay
Colors of fall highlight each ray
Of sun to inspire thoughts of twilight
Of forbearance, of change, of new days

At night the frightening wind
Brings sweeping somber thoughts
Of chilly gusts, of lonely nights
A yearning yells at those sights…

To get away, to stay adrift, to disengage
All those memories glide softly back
Into those enclosed caskets
Never shall I excavate.

This fall I am burying them deeper
This fall is more buoyant, more blissful
The resilience rests on my brow
The happiness lives with me now

In my thoughts, in my loving home
In all seasons, even in this fall
It brings sweet memories of moments dear
My words fly now with the same cheer.

© Balroop Singh

All rights reserved.

One of my favorite poems, I am sharing it again as many of my new friends may not have not read it.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

Do We Do Everything For Our Own Selves?

People do everything for their own self. When somebody said this to me long ago, I had dismissed the thought as useless banter, completely convinced that all we do is not just for ourselves. There are friends and family and bosses who receive our love, attachment and services.

I have seen my aunt working all day, doing all household chores with a smile, answering all my innocent questions why she didn’t get any time to rest and why she doesn’t get tired! She didn’t seem to work for her own self…one more convincing thought that reinforced that we don’t do everything for our own selves!!

Probably I wasn’t mature enough to understand or I didn’t want to. She worked all day because she didn’t have a choice. She had to make her place in the family she got married into. Those were the times when women who thought for themselves; got kicked out of the house they were married into.

This thought reverberated in my mind recently when I went to see a very sick friend who could barely recognize me or talk to me. As she lay there, struggling to talk to me in unrecognizable syllables, I felt so helpless. To be honest, I felt most uncomfortable and wanted to get out of her room as quickly as possible. I asked myself…‘what am I doing here?’

The answers that I tried to draw out of me were quite surprising and enlightening. ‘It was my moral duty.’ ‘I wanted to show I cared.’ ‘It was expected of me.’

All of them connected with me! Had I done this for my pride, my own ego and myself, in order to escape my own distress? Did I visit her for my own peace of mind?

Was it what experts call ‘psychological hedonism?’

Eager to seek more answers I went to the ultimate savior – ‘Google’ and discovered that Thomas Hobbes, the seventeenth century philosopher believed that ‘our self-interest reigns supreme in all our acts.’

I have spent many days pondering, watching, understanding and analyzing…small children grab and push to get their little goals accomplished, they refuse to share and have to be repeatedly told that sharing is a virtue. Siblings vie with each other to prove their worth, probably impelled by an innate competitive spirit.

Sportsmen do the same and even can hurt the players of another team to win.

We donate only those things, which we don’t need. Even those rich who donate liberally to exemplify their generosity make it a point to highlight their kind acts in one form or the other. All charity is done to satisfy our own ego, to gain recognition, fame and respect.

Are empathy, compassion and altruism mere words, which may compel us to put up a façade of humanity to alleviate the agony of others?

All we do for others can be summarized under three headings:

  • Moral duty, which we have to perform for our family and friends
  • Expectations of others to show that we are successful and working
  • Self-satisfaction

“There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self.” ― Aldous Huxley

All spiritual gurus and scriptures tell us that attachments are mere illusions. The sooner we detach ourselves from worldly possessions, the better it would be!

This paradox of accomplishing and then giving up with a smile and satisfaction has always confounded me.

Just look within and introspect! Ask this question to your inner self: ‘what have I done for others?’ I know many answers would crop up immediately but consider before blurting out…was it selfless? Did you do any good without expectations?

I agree with David Hume, “ There is some benevolence, however small, infused into our bosom; some spark of friendship for human kind; some particle of the dove, kneaded into our frame, along with the elements of the wolf and the dove.”

We have been trying to evolve into better beings. Good thoughts do influence us. Positivity does bring the best out of us but we need constant reminders so that those elements of ‘wolf,’ which are kneaded into our DNA, can be kept under wraps.

Many questions remain unanswered. Let’s discuss them in the comments section.

Thank you for reading this. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

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Balroop Singh.

 

Darkness And Decay

hope

When I look at
The dark clouds merging into white
With the sun smiling through them
I wonder…
Aren’t dark corridors natural?
Don’t they creep in uninvited?

The sun lies within
Its glow can permeate all around us
Darkness dispels with its power
That streak of hope, that blue oasis
Beckons for beacon of light
Which scatters slowly

When I look at the rain
I wonder…
Is isolation so cathartic?
Isn’t merging so natural
Like drops of water falling…
Blending back bemused!

When I look at the fall
I wonder…
How beauty changes its connotation
Decay doesn’t decimate it
Golden gifts that Mother Nature gathers
Are treasures for posterity!

fall-is-beautiful

© Balroop Singh
All rights reserved.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

If you have liked this poem, please share it at your favorite social networks.
Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.