How Individualism Affects Your Personality

An individual facing the universe

Individualism is“a social theory advocating the liberty, rights, or independent action of the individual.”

Individualism gives prominence to self-development; personal achievements and independence of a person. When children grow up with the concept that they are enough, they have the potential to accomplish their goals and they have the freedom to take their own decisions, they value personal rights and their own space more than family values. A collective decision is considered oppressive.

On the surface individualism seems to be perfect as it offers absolute freedom and infinite possibilities of following your own aspirations but dig deeper and ask those who get mired in internal strife. Ask those who blame themselves for their failure. Ask those who are drowning in the sea of anguish and yearn for help. Ask those who have to take anti-depressants to cope with the pressures of life.

While individualism adds confidence, self-discipline and self-control to our personality, many essential characteristics are disregarded.

Individualism makes us self-centered:

When you are encouraged to discover your potential or follow your passion, you develop the habit of thinking only for yourself. It is always your endeavor, your success and your happiness. Self becomes larger than siblings, friends and parents and when it is time to contribute significantly to your society, it seems a burden. Such individuals drift away from most of the family relationships and seem selfish.

Self-doubts grow bigger:

Who doesn’t have to deal with self-doubts? It is difficult to handle frustrations alone. Setbacks seem like monsters, failures have to be owned and faced alone, and loneliness grows into depression. When stressful situations are not shared, their dimensions keep absorbing your confidence. Therapists step in to reinforce the fact “you are enough” but self-doubts refuse to dispel. On the other hand, Asian cultures promote sharing personal problems with family and friends and they serve the purpose of re-igniting wavering self-belief.

Individualism creates disconnect:

Personal attitudes eat into the core values of respect, patience and generosity. Self gets so exalted that love for others seems to be a chore. You may learn tactful behavior but relationships rest on the plank of façade. Senior members of your family cease to exist for you and visiting them or looking after them is not your responsibility. Those who nurtured you with the best of their abilities seem superfluous and are expected to fend for themselves.

Individualism breeds insensitivity:

Individualism gives top priority to your own interests, you become insensitive to the needs and desires of your spouse and children. You expect them to follow you in all your decisions, as your perceptions fail to see beyond your own expectations. Aggressive behavior, violence, emotional instability, incoherence in families, lack of interest in community activities and mental health issues are directly related to individualistic culture.

Individualism, a product of the western world, has silently crept into those societies that believe in collectivism. They have always taken pride in raising balanced individuals because of close knitted ties that are nurtured, and values of respect, altruism and cooperation are imbibed naturally, while growing up.

As individualism flourished in the west, touching its highest forms of selfishness, collectivism evolved and absorbed some elements of individualistic culture, granting freedom of thought and expression, taking one’s own decisions but following family values too. Such individuals have the best of both the cultures. A healthy combination of both could prove beneficial for your personality.

Thank you for reading this. Please share your valuable reflections, as they are much appreciated.

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Balroop Singh.

Allow yourself To Be A Better Person

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A New Horizon

Sunrise
Sue Vincent’s #Writephoto Valley

                         I didn’t know this valley
                   The valley you pushed me into
               The valley that glimmers with hope
                  That erases shadowy existence

                   I owe you a special gratitude
                  I am glad I don’t have to walk
                     Into your hollow world
                     Of pretense and glamor

                    I have discovered a domain
                        Of buoyant blessings
                           I walk free now
                    To touch a new horizon 

                   The solace of open skies
             Has melted all anger and anguish
               The caverns that throttled me
                         I can no longer see!  

                 Opportunities are smiling
                    Love is all around me
            Open arms of Mother Nature
        Can descry and dispel despondency.
© Balroop Singh.

Thanks to Sue Vincent for an inspiring Thursday photo prompt Valley #writephoto. 

You can click here for more poetry.

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Emerging From Shadows – Cover Reveal #New Book

When I published ‘Sublime Shadows Of Life,’ my first poetry book, I didn’t have a blog. I didn’t know that an author ought to plan. Writing to me was a natural gift, an innate ability to share what lies within our heart.

The allure of Indie world was so dazzling that I just waded into it like an enthusiastic adolescent, soaring on the wings of hope, unaware of the pitfalls. I didn’t know I would flounder and flail and almost get drowned!

It has been a long journey of striving to learn and I am not the one who would give up so easily. The writer in me says: KEEP GOING!

So having elbowed some of my ignorance out, this is a proud moment for me as, my second book of poetry is ready to get published. This time I am requesting the support of all my old and new friends and bloggers to make it a success.

Emerging from Shadows:book

Book Blurb:
From darkness into light, from despair onto the wider ways of hope…life oscillates between sunshine and shadows. Emerging from shadows is a choice, which lies dormant, which can be gently inspired by self-talk.

Each poem in this book banks on the hope of emerging stronger, saner, positive and resilient. Each poem in this book would talk to you, revealing layers of enclosed emotions. Each poem would divulge a secret path that could lead you into the world of poise and serenity.

When turbulences hit, when shadows of life darken, when they come like unseen robbers, with muffled exterior, when they threaten to shatter your dreams, it is better to break free rather than get sucked by the vortex of emotions.

Excerpt from the bookLooking forward to your support:
I am extremely grateful to all those friends who have always helped me with sharing my books at the social networks and even writing reviews.

Prominent among them are Harleena Singh, Vishnu, Somali, Marie and Debbie. I also owe gratitude to Sally, Christy and Kevin Cooper for promoting my books at their blogs.

I am sure all of you would continue to shower your love and kindness. If any of you reading this would like to review my book, please feel free to say so in the comments.

I also look forward to the support of all those valued visitors who like my blog.

Emerging From Shadows will be published on Friday, 21 July, 2017 and will be available in ebook format at Amazon.

Thank you for reading this. Please share this post at your favorite social networks.

Balroop Singh. 

Freedom At Last

freedom

Walking uphill,
In search of my true self
Guided by the will to self-reflect
At last!
 
I follow the steady stream
Of consciousness, asking all the time
Is it the right time?
Do I need this?
 
Lost in tentative thoughts,
I fail to notice my mates
Lugging along,
Eager to offer succor
 
I tell solitude:
‘I have had enough of you
You can stay away
Let me move ahead.’
 
Determined to abandon distress
I ignore its presence
In the valley, on the side
Disregarding its alacrity to pull backwards
 
Tears refused to subside
They overpowered my spirit
I sat down in the company
Of my oldest confidants
 
Detachment and defiance at last
From the shackles of subjugation…
I soar freely with my new friends
To explore the wide world
 
Hope offered its camaraderie
Positivity promised to permeate around
Acceptance assured affinity
Confidence closed in compliant collusion!
 
© Balroop Singh
All rights reserved.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

My Friend ‘Five’ Still Loves Me Despite My Dislike For Her

Beauty of dawn

There was a time when “Five” was my dearest friend or a compulsive pal…she always chimed in as a loud, musical buddy, trying to remind me that I couldn’t survive without her, I would deeply regret if I disregarded her and therefore I had to share my steaming cup of tea with her.

No longer so! I dumped and divorced her and found my freedom. She continued to arrive even when I snapped off the musical chords she loved. I know I was callous but I had found another friend – ‘Eight’ who believed in liberation, who accosted and accompanied me into all those cool corridors of the dream world.

I owe a deep gratitude towards my dear friend “Five” for making me what I am today, for all those reflections she shared, all those words of caution she spilled around me and the plans she made for me to keep myself and my family happy and healthy, providing me with enough time to step outside and walk in the beauty of the first rays of the sun before I could rush to my work.

Isn’t that what we expect from friends? A true companion, who gave priority to my needs, caressed me when my limbs refused to leave the comfort of bed, reminding me that the moment I move my butt, I would be happier!

She taught me forbearance, calmness and patience. She walked hand in hand with me to the milestone of punctuality, acquainted me with the virtue called self-discipline. She impressed upon me the value of time but I detested her each morning for coming too early, yearning to shun her. She was quite understanding, as she gave me a breather on weekends!

I appreciate her noble nature as she still comes uninvited with her reminders, pulling me out to gaze at the eastern horizon, inspiring me to lift the pen that I pick up at will, motivating me to record those lovely moments of mesmerizing meetings, minutes of which gleam in my poetry.

‘Eight’ has relieved me of all my worries, time crumbles at his feet and he takes me into self-appointed hours of joy…the grace that I have acquired in his company is inimitable, the emotions that he acquainted me with are exquisite…he doesn’t believe in accelerating the pace of the day…the serenity with which he moves forward is unparalleled.

The soft soliloquies of ‘Eight’ endow me with the elegance of moving forward. He shows me how to slow down, let go and detach discreetly.

My oldest friends joy and woe visit me quite less now because happiness wields all the power in my home. Their dissonance started due to the demanding nature of joy and it often clashed with the calmness of happiness. I also like her, as she possesses the potential to drive away agony, angst and fear.

Now I hang out with “Eight” and “Happiness” and let their nuances color my thoughts. They hold a strange power to guide me, the comfort of their company steers me into the positive corridors of life.

“Five” knows I have forgotten her but she continues to bestow her blessings on me by visiting me whenever I need her, whenever I lack inspiration and those are the times I get up early from my bed even now.

Goodness is forgotten so easily! Indifference and hatred distress us forever!

Forgiveness is so hard whereas goodness doesn’t even come to our mind when we think of one mean act of somebody. We need reminders for invoking amity and altruism.My friend five still loves me

“Five” continues to shimmer in my heart albeit I dislike her placement on the clock. I know her friendship with me grew warmer only due to that placement!

“They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.” – Andy Warhol

Do you like waking up early in the morning?

Thank you for reading this. Please share your valuable reflections.

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Balroop Singh.